Memories of the Music Cafe

 

                                      Daniel and Mom, in about 2007, a year before his passing
 

 

                Some years ago, our rural county had a music cafe where people could sit, have lunch or dinner, a drink or a snack, and could watch performers on a small stage across the room.  In the back there were multiple rooms where the owner could give music lessons. The food was quite good and it was a great place to go especially of you didn't wish to drive too far on a Fall or Winter evening.  In this era, Stephanie and Adam were in college, but each week, usually when I took Matthew and Daniel to the library, in the evening we would stop off in the music cafe.

               The owner was a singer, songwriter, guitarist, and performer in his own right, and found that founding the music cafe was a way that he could earn a living doing what he loved, while still being at home at night with his wife and young children.  Eventually, the challenges of music lessons, running the restaurant and cafe, and scheduling the acts and weekly activities became overwhelming, and the founder sold his business to a trail of other restaurants, that never seemed to capture our interest the way the original one had.

               Today, almost fifteen years after Daniel's passing, and almost two after Matthew's passing, Nik and I made a rare stop at the county's Dunkin' Donuts.  It was a cold day, and we thought a couple of donuts and some warm drinks would hit the spot.   A man ahead of us was ordering something similar.  I recognized him almost immediately as the founder of the music cafe.  For some reason, he remembered me also.   I told him how much we missed the cafe, and asked him what he and his family were doing now.  He is still giving music lessons, mostly guitar.  He was shocked to hear that both Daniel and Matthew have now died.  He had missed hearing this about either of them. He looked sad when I told him.  I told him because the music cafe had been some of the very best memories I'd had with Daniel and Matthew.  Even when there wasn't an act playing there, we could watch the wide screen television with country music acts performing while having dinner.  It had been a regular weekly habit for us and we had thoroughly enjoyed it.

              Make sure you make as many memories with your children as possible whenever you can.

 

 

 

 

A Birthday That's Never Forgotten

 

 

                                         This is a picture of how Daniel might look at 28.

 

 

 

                 Tomorrow would have been Daniel's twenty-eighth birthday had he remained here on Earth rather than departed sixteen years ago, of presumed sudden arrhythmic death syndrome at age 12 1/2.  Immediate CPR did no good in this instance, and when the sheriff brought the AED, too much time had elapsed.

           On these birthdays I always take a moment to think about what he might be doing had he remained, and how we might have celebrated this day.   Instead, I still man the fort, or the farm as it is, and try to find ways to keep sane, now missing two beloved sons from Earth, both Daniel and Matthew.

                 I still think of you an awful lot and I remember your conversations and thoughts you had.  Gosh Daniel, you were so intelligent and so wise.  No wonder God needed to call you home.

 

                This year, I am going to try to celebrate your life differently than with grieving.   Perhaps rather than being sad, and after sixteen years, I can simply celebrate your life and your time spent here on both the day of your birth, and on the day of your passing.  Lets see how that goes.

 

                 In any event, I am one day closer to seeing you again.  It's a fact I keep tucked in my pocket, a bit like a secret gift, but try not to talk too much about because it upsets the other members of the family.

 

 

                                                          Daniel departed Earth at 12 1/2

 

 

                 Happy Birthday, Daniel.    I love you wider than the oceans and deeper than the seas.

 

    Yes, I can hear you, but I doubt you could possibly "love me more" than I love you.