Notes to Self on Grief

Grief is a cyclic phenomenon. I think some expect us to be "all through" processing our loss inside a year or so. Of course, this is ridiculous because unless Daniel is coming back, then life will realistically be a progression of sailing through life's happenings, and periodically being acutely aware of the fact that you are staring yet one more resultant loss in the face. For example, when Stephanie graduated from the university, it was bittersweet. First, because Daniel was not present at least in a manner in which we could see his beautiful face reflect his expressions, and second, because we again realized that we would not see HIS college graduation here on Earth. It seems that even good things may make us acutely aware of our losses, throughout our lifetimes. This doesn't mean we are perpetually saddened, because we aren't. If we give in to being perpetually sad and chronically sorrowful, then we will not have the time or the emotional reserve to celebrate the life of one of the most intelligent,loving and amusing people I have ever known. Life is still for living,
and Daniel, of all people, would be displeased if we used his departure as an excuse not to continue, or not to enjoy our own remaining time here on Earth.