Another Sudden Ballfield Death

  

(Picture: www.hudl.com )

 


       Next month, it will be five years since our Daniel collapsed and died at our home, with essentially no real medical history which suggested such a thing was even remotely possible.   Since then, Daniel is never very far from our family's thoughts.  Since that time, we have tried to being awareness to both SUDC, sudden unexplained death in childhood, and to SADS, sudden arrhythmic death syndrome, without a great deal of success, I might add.  Since then, we have noted many other sons and daughters who have collapsed, received CPR, or perhaps later, aid from an AED, who have also been lost to their families.  Today was no exception.

            Jacob Vick, a fifteen year old New Kent High School (Virginia) sophomore, was a stand out kid with a 3.7 average.  He was also a starting linebacker on the school's football team.   Jacob seemed fine yesterday according to his coach, but during practice, he collapsed.  They had the good sense to airlift him to a major center at Virginia Commonwealth University Hospital.  Jacob died at the hospital.

         Of course, an autopsy will need to be done to rule out other potential causes of his collapse and sudden death.  However, the pattern sounds a great deal like sudden arrhythmic death syndrome.  A young healthy teen without a known cardiac issue who is bright and diligent plays a sport, seems okay, and then collapses in a cardiac arrest. (Often falling forward.)  Professional attempts at resuscitation, in this scenario, often fail.

           As a nation, we still aren't doing EKG screenings and specialized EKGs such as the microvolt t-wave alternans for those who have a family history of syncope (fainting) or a history of sudden death in the older members of the family. Better screenings should be done on all twelve year old students, and in advance of full participation in sports.   I can assure you that if anything could be done to detect students at risk of a sudden demise such as this, that the families who remain would have wanted that done.  I know I would have.

         Jacob had been treated for a concussion recently, but had been medically cleared to return to practice, on that score.  This collapse could be related to the concussion, as sometimes bleeding or undetected aneurysm can worsen arrhythmias in an arrhythmic prone person, or Jacob's passing may be due to a spontaneous disturbance in heart rhythm.  My family and I send our condolences to the family and friends of Jacob Vick. Those of us on Earth will miss you.



Jacob Vick's Hudl profile


This is Jacob's obituary with funeral information:

VICK, Jacob Aulman, 15, of New Kent, went to be with the Lord on Tuesday, October 29, 2013. He was preceded in death by his grandparents, Conley and Joyce Vick. He was a member of Corinth Baptist Church in New Kent, Va. Jacob was an excellent student and enjoyed sports. He was a Texas Longhorn and Redsox fan. Jacob was a member of the Varsity Football team and Junior Varsity Baseball team at New Kent High School. He also enjoyed playing the electric guitar, skimboarding, surfing and fishing. Jacob always managed to set time aside in making sure he was a great big brother to his two younger sisters. He is survived by his parents, Robert and Susan Vick; sisters, Lucy and Lauren Vick; grandparents, Ronald and Elizabeth Jones; uncles, Kevin Jones (Robin), Tim Vick, Mike Vick (Bobbie); aunt, Beth Vick (Jay); and cousin, Morgan Jones. A memorial service will be held on Saturday, November 2, 2013 at 1 p.m. at New Kent High School, 7501 Egypt Rd., New Kent, Va. Interment services will be private at Washington Memorial Park. In lieu of flowers, memorial contributions may be made, in memory of Jacob Vick, to Corinth Baptist Church, 11650 New Kent Hwy., New Kent, Va. Online condolences may be made at www.nelsenrichmond.com.

Happy Mother's Day

           I must admit that I did not contemplate Mother's Day a great deal before losing a child.   I didn't need flowers, a dinner, or anything terribly special. I used to enjoy receiving a drawing and a handmade card from my kids, and I still treasure these.  I am pretty happy being treated well year round, and so I didn't really feel the need for a fuss on a particular day. After all, I have my birthday.
           However, after the loss of a child, Mother's Day becomes much more significant, much for painful, and a day to endure.  I can't even watch television without hearing about Shari's Berries, and how Mother's Day would be incomplete without them.   Mother's Day is incomplete.  It is incomplete because I am the Mother Duck in the song Daniel used to sing and shed a tear to, where one of the little ducks doesn't come back.  Of course, in the last verse, all the little ducks come back.   Sometimes our lifetimes seem very long before our little duck comes back.  Sometimes the days, and the days leading up to them, can be very hard. Today is one of those days.
           The little card above was found on the SUDC website.   It's a reminder that Mother's Day might be a happy day for many families, but for many of us, who have lost a child in this lifetime, it is a bittersweet day.
I send love, best wishes, and whatever wishes of happy memories I can to my sisters in grief this week.
Take good care of yourselves and of the children you have remaining on this Earth.


A great song for Mother's Day:   This Amazing Love


And Daniel, I am not sorrowful this Mother's Day.   I carry the joy of the memories of having raised as fantastic a young son as you !    I am so grateful for your having made the trip to Earth to be an important part of this family.

A Card from SUDC

After Daniel's sudden passing, and after the initial autopsy when no really definitive answers were found, we knew that we were going to need some help in order to survive this. We began by searching the internet for books and for information on sudden death in infants, children, and teens. We read a lot of studies, ordered a fair number of books on pathology, and anything else which could explain what had happened. It was also a way of staying as busy as we could be, which was our way of coping.
One of the contacts we made via internet was with SUDC. SUDC is the "Sudden Unexplained Death in Childhood" Program. SUDC, co-founded by Laura Crandall, a mother who had not only lost a child as a result of this, but is the program director as well. SUDC is an international resource for parents and families of children whose sudden death cannot be explained following a thorough investigation. They provide forensic information, bereavement support for families, aid legislation with regard to the concerns of families for whom this has occured, and spearhead fundraising for research.
For a really thorough explanation and to see what they are doing, please go to:

http://www.sudc.org/

This is an organization worthy of donations.

I do want to share what they have done for us, and what a difference it has made. When you lose a child, at first, everyone from your child's doctor, to your own, your minister,your employers, your neighbors and even those you know vaguely descend upon you with food, flowers, and goodwill. This is appreciated, although most of us aren't really processing the events well enough to be as appreciative as we might normally be. Your children's friends also come by, not only to comfort you, but to find some solace themselves. This keeps most of us busy for a time, and may help some of us. Very slowly, people and friends forget. Of course, unless Daniel is back, I never will. Almost three years later, I still awaken some mornings, and remember, that he dwells in Heaven now. Sometimes I accept this, and other mornings, I am truly sorrowful all over again, and I revisit those feelings of shock, sorrow, guilt, and loss. The same is true of my family. Some days we really can be philosophical and cling to our faith, and other days, we are just one man down, and nothing makes that any better. Of course, at about the year mark, distant family and friends are tired of grieving. They move on, and they expect you to do the same. More comfortable for them is never mentioning your son who has passed. More comfortable for your close family is remembering him when he comes up, or enters your mind. What families need to know is that their loved one, their child, will be remembered. That he made a difference and counted here while he was on Earth, and now also. Sometimes this disparity or lack of understanding costs family friends and sometimes it loses them close ties with family members as well.
SUDC has made an incredible difference in that regard. Both my husband's parents and my own are gone now, and so bereavement and support two and a half years down the road is hard to come by. Friends often have their own challenges and losses, and even therapists have a grief limit, if you choose to find one. SUDC helped by having both Laura, and nurse Paula Goldblatt calling us episodically from the beginning. First, they called to make sure we knew of all the programs they had available. They were available to us, but we were not hounded to do things for which we did not have time, or for which we did not feel ready. They were simply available knowing how bad our periodic pain could be. Paula died of cancer on July 5,2010, and I missed her last call. She worked for SUDC very close to her passing. Her voice remained on our voice mail as a comfort for a long time afterward. She had gone on to see the children of the families for whom she was so supportive, and I know they will be thankful for her efforts with their families here on Earth. Laura has also not missed a birthday of Daniel's or the anniversary of his passing (which other families may call his "Angel Day") Sometime I will need to tell them how valuable their periodic support has been. This week we got a lovely card from them, commemorating what would have been Daniel's fifteenth birthday. They were the only friend or family,other than the family that lives here, under our roof, who remembered. (A friend who is a psychic also remembered and mentioned Daniel's birthday on a bereavement listserv where we are both members.)
Although living day to day may become easier for families, their children's birthdays and the days they departed from Earth when they come each year, may not. SUDC has been there for us, and we are very, very grateful.
________


Declan Galbraith is a teenaged performer who hails from Kent in England. He is of both Scottish and Irish ancestry.

Birthdays and Losses

Yesterday was both the birthday of my husband but also it's the birthday of my father who has passed, and is also with Daniel. We celebrated my husband's birthday by buying him a metal detector, so that he, among other things, can locate the tractor keys he lost in the field last year. The kids got him some different colored "Tractor Supply" t-shirts for his off times, and a "Tractor Maniac" sign for one of the outbuildings. My husband is an engineer, yet enjoys his time away from pressure and industry playing farmer. The way food prices and the economy in general are going, this may have to become a more serious endeavor.
We celebrated my Dad's birthday with recalling special memories, prayer and remembrances. I hope he and Daniel had a wonderful day, or however days or units of time, if they are counted in that way, are quantified. Happy Birthday Dad !
We also had some bad news this week. Some time after Daniel's unexpected passing, a wonderful group called SUDC, based in New Jersey, called us and lent support. SUDC stands for Sudden Unexplained Death in Childhood, and it apparently, more common than I had realized. One of the people who freely called and checked on us for quite a long time, was Paula Goldblatt, an RN who was deeply involved in SUDC, it's outreach, and its research etc. This week we heard than Paula died on July 5. She did a great deal of very valuable work with grieving families. To read about SUDC,please go to:

http://www.sudc.org/

Paula, you will truly be missed, and I am sorry that I was not at home for your last call to check on us. Your support and encouragement has meant the world to us.